10 Prayers For An Emotionally Abusive Marriage

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Do you have an abusive husband? Use these prayers for an emotionally abusive marriage, written by a wife who sought God’s help in these words.

**I am not a counselor, pastor, psychiatrist, or professional. I am just someone who experienced an emotionally abusive marriage and prayed my heart out for years. These prayers are some of the very ones I prayed when I was in an emotionally abusive marriage myself.

They are heartfelt and authentic but should not be considered to be advice on your particular situation. I cannot recommend either divorce or staying together in your unique circumstance but, as in any situation involving physical violence, please seek professional help to keep you and your family safe.***

If you came across this post, the likelihood is that you are in an emotionally abusive marriage. First of all, I am just so very sorry. You have probably heard words that never should have been spoken but still cut like a knife.

I want to be very clear in saying that emotional or verbal abuse is still abuse.

I wholeheartedly believe that lines up with God’s Word (my Christian counselor agreed).

You may have heard otherwise. Verbal and emotional abuse tend to be minimized.

But it was very real to me.

There were nights I begged my ex-husband to hit me instead of abusing me with his words.

When I reported him to the police at the advice of my lawyer after a particularly angry fit of rage, the policeman just stared and asked, “So…he never hit you then?” As if physical abuse would have been the only indicator of a problem worth addressing.

It’s not.

That’s why I feel it’s so important to talk about different types of domestic violence. Whether it’s physical harm, emotional pain, mental anguish (also known as mental abuse), sexual abuse, or financial control, it can hurt any person’s life a lot. Tactics can include manipulation, intimidation, isolation, threats, and coercion. It’s heartbreaking because it can happen to anyone—spouses, partners, family members, or those sharing a home. Such abuse can seriously harm the victim’s physical health and mental well-being in the long run.

Verbal and emotional abuse are real and very destructive. If you are unsure if you are in an abusive relationship, please look over this article by Healthline which lays out 64 signs of mental and emotional abuse.

It took me years to even recognize that what I was experiencing was abuse so I didn’t even know I needed to be getting professional help for most of those years.

But I prayed. I prayed so hard.

I have a box of tear-stained journals full of prayers because, even when I didn’t know I needed a counselor, I knew I needed God’s help.

I prayed all of the prayers below but there were also many times when I felt so broken that my prayers simply consisted of saying, “Jesus…Jesus…I need You.”

Whatever prayers you can muster…God hears.

The prayers below are written from my perspective as a wife with an emotionally abusive husband but if you are the husband of an emotionally abusive wife, please just switch out the pronouns to fit your situation.

Do the same thing if you are a loving friend or family member praying for the victims of emotional abuse in need.

Prayers & Bible Verses For Emotional Abuse & Verbal Abuse

1. For Healing The Broken Relationship

Abba Father,

Please heal my marriage. I’m desperate for help and can’t see any solution during this time of need. I know that, as it is right now, it’s very broken and feels like it’s beyond repair. His words have hurt me in ways I never thought possible.

My heart is raw and I feel like I don’t have any fight left in me. Our years of marriage is full of fear, bitterness, resentment, despair, and so many other things that do not glorify You. I’m at the end of my rope. But You are our Almighty Healer and I believe that You can do a miracle in my marriage.

Heal his heart of past hurts. Proverbs 12:18 says that the words of the reckless pierce like swords (which is exactly how his words have felt to me), but also that the tongue of the wise brings healing.

Help me to be a healing voice in my marriage. Show me where to reach out for help. Surround me and my husband with supportive people who will help us both work through our problems and experience true healing.

This has to come from You, Father. I lift my marriage up to You and ask that You give us complete healing so that we can use their relationship to show the world glimpses of Your love. I’m asking for a miracle and You are the only One who can deliver.

Despite these mixed-up feelings, I’m making the first step today to believe in the power of prayer all over again. Sometimes, I hold back because it might seem like a long story, but then I remember that You genuinely care about every detail of my life and put my tears in a bottle.

Lord, revive my prayer life. As I get uplifted by Your love, I yearn to draw closer to You and experience the grace of life in unexpected moments of connection.

In Jesus’ Almighty Name, I pray. Amen.

Read more prayers for marriage reconciliation here.

The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.

Proverbs 12:18

2. For Healthy Boundaries In The Marriage For Both Husband & Wife

Almighty God,

At times, I quietly ponder what the Word of God says about dealing with a toxic relationship. And here You are, reassuring me that I’m not alone, as You always do.

I know You are just. You are a God who fights for the abused and stands up for the oppressed. I ask that You do just that in my marriage, but I also ask that You empower me to fight for myself as well.

I feel so small right now…so beaten down. Give me the confidence to say no when it is appropriate, and empower me to intentionally choose to do the right things. Give me the strength to lay down healthy, loving boundaries and stick to them.

Dear Father, grant me wisdom in showing me when I should stand firm, when I should stay silent, when to be flexible, when to leave, and how to get help. I don’t want to be selfish. I want to honor You. But giving in to his every whim is NOT honoring You and it needs to stop.

I don’t feel like I have the strength to stand up against him so I’m depending on You to hold me up in my weakness. Boundaries might be the best way I can love my husband right now. Please, show me how to gently but firmly lay them as a loving wife.

In Your Son‘s Name, I pray. Amen.

A hot-tempered person must pay the penalty;

    rescue them, and you will have to do it again.

Proverbs 19:19

Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God.

John 3:20-21

3. For An Abusive Husband’s Heart

Dear God,

I know my husband’s heart is not right with You. Even he knows his heart isn’t right with you. I’ve tried so hard to be patient and loving and kind to show him Your unconditional love through my words and actions, but it isn’t good enough, Lord. I’m no substitute for You.

Please, heal his heart. I don’t know what past hurts he is harboring but I know they are causing him to lash out at me unprovoked. I know he does everything he can to distance himself from experiencing any hurt in any relationship.

Instead, he chooses easy relationships and ditches people when it gets hard. He distances himself from any real connection.

I don’t even know if he is capable of authentic relationships anymore. He is selfish, wanting to experience the benefits of a marriage without any responsibility, any commitment, and any work.

And when something doesn’t go his way, he responds in the most hurtful ways he can think of. His abusive behavior is pure evil.

But You, my powerful God, are bigger. You can shine Your light in the darkness of his heart. You can expose his sin and heal the darkest places that he doesn’t even want You to know about. Soften his hardened heart with Your unconditional love. And in Your mercy, deliver him from any strongholds and evil spirit, setting him free to embrace Your grace.

Bring him to his knees and show him how desperately he needs You. Because You are the only one that can help him and heal him.

In Jesus’ Name I pray, amen.

For this people’s heart has become calloused;

    they hardly hear with their ears,

    and they have closed their eyes.

Otherwise they might see with their eyes,

    hear with their ears,

    understand with their hearts

and turn, and I would heal them.

Matthew 13:15

4. For The Abused Wife’s Heart

Gracious Lord,

My heart is so broken right now. I never imagined words could destroy a soul but, even though the hand of my spouse never physically harmed me, I feel emotionally bruised and battered. My heart is raw after being stabbed again and again.

I’ve been yelled at, cursed at, belittled, insulted, threatened, blamed for his actions, and my emotions have been mocked and invalidated time and time again. These are all painful memories and I can’t bear this emotional pain any longer. I need You, Lord. I desperately need You. Please, heal my heart. Holy Spirit, I need Your healing touch.

O Lord, You are my only hope. He never owns up to his actions or says sorry, which makes the healing process harder without him being part of it. I refuse to sink to his level. I refuse to be defeated by his sin. But I’m honestly drowning, God.

I’m barely hanging on and I need You to lift me up on Your wings like eagles. I lift my heart up completely to You in full surrender. I am Yours, God. Please, let your strength shine through my weakness. Get me through another day. Protect me from his attacks. Heal my hurting heart.

Help me remember my true identity: a child of God. Hold me close in Your comforting arms and everlasting love!

In Your Son’s precious Name, I pray. Amen.

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted

    and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalm 34:18

5. For Help & Support

God,

I desperately need help. I am so isolated in this marriage. I’ve been trying so hard to respect and honor my husband by not telling people about all that goes on in our house behind closed doors but, in the process, I’ve completely isolated myself. Just thinking about making phone calls for help freaks me out, and I’m trembling in fear! It’s been like this for a long time.

Nobody understands what I’m going through because they just don’t know about most of it. Please, show me who I can reach out to for help. Direct me to the right support groups, professional counselors, church leaders, or even family members filled with Your Word to help end this cycle of abuse. Give me wisdom in how to speak respectfully but also truthfully about our marriage. I can’t do this alone anymore.

Bring people into my life who will understand and support me and continue to point me back to You, not just suggest easy answers that will only be bandaid solutions for a bullet-hole-wound-problem. Proverbs 12:26 tells us to choose friends carefully and I feel that’s especially true now. I want to do this right, Lord, honoring You every step of the way.

I know You are my ever-present support but will You please bring a small circle of people in my life to surround me with support and much prayer, too? I believe You created us to thrive in community and I really need that right now.

I love You, Lord. In Jesus’ Name, I pray. Amen.

The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.

Proverbs 12:26

6. For Protection From Verbal Abuse

Dear Heavenly Father,

I cry out to You today begging for Your protection. I’m not safe in this marriage. He hasn’t laid a hand on me but he has destroyed me with his words, his threats, and his anger. I shake with fear when he starts yelling. I cower when he starts throwing things. My teeth chatter, even hours after the screaming stops.

I’m terrified to be in my own home when he is there. I don’t feel safe anywhere. His anger is unpredictable and there is nothing I can do to stop it. I’m asking for Your almighty protection, Lord, from verbal abusers like my husband.

I believe that You have a mighty convicting work to do and only Your unfailing love can change him. In Exodus, Your Word says, “The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.” Please, fight for me. I choose to dwell in You, my refuge. I love You and I trust You.

In Your Name I pray, amen.

The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.”

Exodus 14:14

Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
    will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
    my God, in whom I trust.”

Psalm 91:1-2

Read more prayers for protection in an abusive situation from Psalm 91 here.

7. For A Way Out Of The Abuse

Almighty Father,

You are my only safe space. I can’t do this anymore. I have been walking in this darkness for years now. His actions have hurt me beyond words. I need not only a way out, but Your hedge of protection. I plead the powerful Blood of Jesus over my life. Surround me, Lord, with Your holy angels, to guard me against abuse.

I never thought divorce would be an option for me. I know You hate divorce. But you also hate violence against your people and abusive homes. I’ve never taken that verse in Malachi as a whole before, only in separate parts. I hate divorce, too. But is that where you are leading me?

I don’t see any other answers. I’ve fought so hard for my marriage but he’s not fighting. He’s destroying. He’s abusing. He’s unfaithful. I will continue to fight if you tell me to. But I don’t have any more to give.

I’m at the end of my rope. My heart can’t take this psychological abuse anymore. Honoring You is my number one goal but I don’t believe You want me continuing to live like this. This is not your will for my life or for my marriage.

Will You please give me wisdom and lead me to the right solution, Lord? Is it separation? Divorce? Something else I haven’t considered? Please, show me the answer clearly. I need to know my next steps are led by You. I can’t make this decision on my own.

In Your Name I pray, amen.

“For I hate divorce,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “and him who covers his garment with violence,” says the Lord of armies. “So be careful about your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously.”

Malachi 2:16

**If you are thinking about divorce, please seek help and counsel from a pastor, Christian counselor, or other trained professional. It is not a decision to make lightly and you might need extra help to plan a safe escape.

8. For Peace That Surpasses Understanding

Dear Lord Jesus,

You’re a Good Father who sees every little thing in my life. Yes, you’re the God who sees me.

I ask that You cover my marriage with Your peace that surpasses all understanding. Emotional abuse in a marriage is an incredibly stressful thing to experience. My heart is raw from the words he throws at me like daggers. I’m grieving the marriage I thought I was signing up for.

I’m frustrated and distraught that he has no response to my heartache. It seems like the more pain I’m experiencing, the more cold, angry, and hurtful he becomes. This is the man I fell in love with and I can’t feel an ounce of concern that he has for me anymore. But Your righteous right hand and peace can cover all of this and more, Lord.

Let it wash over every fear, every doubt, and every frustration that I have and overflow into my life and my heart. While he is fighting to destroy, You give life. Where he creates conflict, You offer peace. Where he is fighting to divide us, You bring unity. Cover me with Your peace.

It would make no sense for me to feel at peace right now but that’s exactly how your peace works – without boundaries and without me needing to understand. I need You, Lord.

In Your Son’s Name, I pray. Amen.

And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:7

9. For A Husband To End An Affair

Lord Jesus Christ,

I need Your help. My husband is having an affair with another woman. Every time he gets caught, he gets so angry and blames me for his actions. He tells me I’m not loving enough, I’m not meeting his needs, I’m not making him happy…I thought those things were true for so long – that if I was just a better wife, he wouldn’t look for another woman.

But I know that’s a lie now. I know that, no matter how perfect I was, I would never be able to satisfy him. He is the one choosing to live in sin and that is not my burden to bear. His satisfaction in our marriage has to come from You changing his heart, Lord.

Finding out that my husband cheated on me is the hardest thing to bear. But you know what, God? I’m grateful because You’re here, helping me get through it all.

There will always be a woman out there who is prettier and more exciting than I am. Please, transform his heart. Give him a heart to be faithful to me, to our marriage. Let him feel the weight of him breaking the covenant he made in our marriage. Convict his heart and bring him back to me – not just physically, but emotionally, as well.

You can heal all things but he has to want to make our marriage work, Lord. And that has to be from You. I’ve tried to win him over in my words and actions but I’m not powerful enough. It’s a miracle only You can do and I believe You can. Please, end his affair. Show the other woman that what she is doing is wrong, too. Fight for my marriage with me.

In the Name of Jesus, I pray, amen.

Click here for more prayers for a cheating husband.

One who commits adultery with a woman is lacking sense; He who would destroy himself commits it.

Proverbs 6:32

For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, acts of adultery, other immoral sexual acts, thefts, false testimonies, and slanderous statements.

Matthew 15:19

10. For The Abused Wife’s Self-Confidence

Merciful God,

My husband’s words have ripped my self-confidence to shreds. He has insulted my appearance, my intelligence, my relationships, my work, and more.

I feel like all that’s left is the shell of the person that I used to be. Even when I’ve tried to cling to the words that You use to define me, his voice still creeps in. It wears me down.

It’s exhausting. Please, Lord, rebuild my confidence to be built on You and You alone. Not on my appearance, my intelligence, my relationships, my work, or anyone else’s opinion of me. You made me on purpose and for a purpose. Please, show me what that is.

Help me to not only know that I am worthy because I am a daughter of the King but also to feel that Truth. My husband can’t destroy my confidence if it depends on You alone.

Help me to work toward believing that’s true. I’ve felt like such a failure as a woman and as a wife but I have worked so hard to please him and You. I’m so thankful that You see my heart.

None of my efforts have gone unnoticed in Your eyes, even if all of them have been left unappreciated in our home. Thank You for being my rock. I love You, I trust You, and I rely on You to be the source of my confidence.

It’s a relief to know that the love of God is the only thing that never changes! No matter how hard my circumstances may be right now, help me center my thoughts on the new life you’ve blessed me with—a life overflowing with peace, joy, abundance, and countless blessings—rather than dwelling on emotional wounds.

In Jesus’ Name, I pray, amen.

For you created my inmost being;

    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

    your works are wonderful,

    I know that full well.

Psalm 139:13-14

but those who hope in the Lord

    will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles;

    they will run and not grow weary,

    they will walk and not be faint.

Isaiah 40:31

See this article for more Bible verses on self-confidence.

Conclusion

Dear friends, an emotionally abusive marriage can be one of the most challenging experiences a person can face. First time or not, the impact of domestic abuse on good relationships and a person’s self-respect can be profound. Coping with an abusive spouse and the effects of abusive people in our lives can take a toll on physical health, mental well-being, and even the well-being of children of the most High God. It’s crucial to remember that as human beings, we deserve to live a life free from sexual abuse, mental abuse, and any form of physical abuse. These prayers are offered as a source of strength, hope, and guidance for anyone facing the challenges of an emotionally abusive marriage. May God bring comfort to those who need it, and may they serve as a reminder that no one is alone in their journey toward healing and restoration. Remember, you are worthy of love and respect. Your inner peace matters.

Need More Prayers & Bible Verses?

6 Prayers For A Broken Heart

29 Bible Verses on Husbands

7 Prayers For My Husband

6 Prayers For Couples

25 Bible Verses On Marriage

29 Bible Verses On Wives

8 Prayers When You’re Worried